Do Partners Notice When You’re Softer? Here’s What We Found Out

It’s tempting to think that your sexual decline only affects you. It’s happening to your body, after all. So why would your softness impact your partner?

In reality, your partner may be the first to notice there’s a problem. 

“Surprisingly, my clinic actually receives calls from some partners who are noticing that their man isn’t as hard as in the past,” says Paul Thompson, M.D., a urologist and surgeon for more than three decades. “They complain that their man is in denial about the problem, and they want to know if there’s anything we can do to help their partner.”

When you’re softer, it can affect both your partner and your relationship. Read on to discover more about how your loved one really feels about your becoming softer.

How Women Feel: What the Research Says

Most women know what it feels like to have a partner lose an erection during sex. A study in the journal Sexual Medicine surveyed 13,817 women and found that 79% of those women had experienced their partner unable to maintain his erection during sexual activity.(1)

A study in the Journal of Sexual Medicine reported on the exact toll a man’s erectile dysfunction takes on a woman. In that study, women reported engaging in sexual activity significantly less frequently after their partner developed ED in comparison with before.(2) 

After their partner developed ED, significantly fewer women experienced sexual desire, arousal, or orgasm always or most times they had sex. In addition, significantly fewer women reported satisfaction with their sexual relationship after their partner developed ED, compared with before.(2) 

The women’s decreased sexual satisfaction and frequency of orgasm were significantly related to the male partner's self-reported severity of ED.(2) On the other hand, the women whose men were getting treated for their ED were more likely to experience sexual desire, arousal, and orgasm "almost always" or "most times" compared to the women whose men were not being treated.(2) 

She May Think You’re Having an Affair

If you’re having trouble in the bedroom, your partner might start to think you’ve lost that loving feeling, even if it’s not true. According to an article published in Nature Reviews Urology, sexual decline can lead to a partner feeling confused and less desirable, causing low self-esteem.(3)

Research has found that poor sexual function can trigger suspicions in your partner that you’re having an affair.(3) This can lead to feelings of betrayal that are completely unjustified. 

Emotional and Behavioral Changes Affect Your Relationship 

Erectile dysfunction can cause some men to become emotionally distant, which can lead to tension in a relationship. A man with ED may also make excuses not to have sex, leading to a sexually frustrated partner and a possible sexless relationship. 

How Women Feel When You Blame Them for the Problem

In a survey of 13,617 females, one out of seven women had experienced their partner blaming them for losing an erection.(1) Women who were blamed for their partner’s ED were more likely to end sexual encounters with their man, were less sexually satisfied, and were more likely to end the relationship due to their partner’s ED. 

How to Fix Your Relationship and Your Erectile Dysfunction 

There are two ways to keep your ED from impacting your relationship with your partner: talk about the problem and show your partner you’re taking steps to treat your ED. 

Talking about ED can be awkward, but letting your partner know you’re still attracted to them is important. Keep the romance alive by doing things like giving them flowers for no reason. Let them know you’re working with your doctor to resolve underlying health issues and that you hope you’ll be back on top of your game again soon.

In addition, at-home acoustic soundwave therapy is a good way to support your erectile health. A lot of couples use it to bring back the spark in their relationship. Here is what some couples are saying:

• “We decided to spice up our date night with my using the at-home acoustic soundwave therapy device. Setting it up was a breeze, and the night was filled with laughter and excitement. It’s the perfect way to keep the romance alive!”—Donald, Verified Buyer

•  “Ever since I started using the at-home acoustic soundwave therapy device, my girlfriend and I have been on cloud nine. She jokes about how she got the best deal in the world. I just laugh and enjoy the happiness it’s brought us.”—William, Verified Buyer 

• “We decided to celebrate our first anniversary with the at-home acoustic soundwave therapy device. Setting it up was a piece of cake, and the evening was more romantic and fun than ever. It’s like a magic wand for our relationship.”—Gordon, Verified Buyer 

Your Partner Knows You Best 

The bottom line?  Many guys are in denial that they’re not as hard as they used to be, and, your partner may be the first to know when you’re soft in the sack. When your partner notices you’re losing your erections more often, they might worry that you’re not attracted to them anymore or that you’re having an affair. 

Finding ways to communicate with your partner and staying romantic and affectionate even when you’re frustrated about your ED can go a long way in keeping your relationship alive. Using an at-home acoustic soundwave therapy device is one popular and effective way to keep both you and your partner happy.

Sources:

1. https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC8240332/

2. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/16422826/

 3. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/26832165/